Skincare and Youthfulness

Hello Readers,

Yes, I am in my 50s, here is me with no makeup, no filters.

My facial skincare routine is the following (entirely independent and not sponsored.)

Morning

Neutrogena cleanser with cool water followed by Dr. Louis all-in-one Light Essence and La Roche-Posay SPF 50 facial sunscreen.

Night

Neutrogena cleanser, Aveda exfoliant every 2-3 days, followed by Dr. Louis all-in-one Light Essence. Osmia moisturizer when I have my perioral dermatitis breakouts (along with Elidel anti-inflammation prescription cream). Clarins multi-active night cream on my neck. Clarins Total Eye Lift Cream.

Other factors which help: lots of water, good sleep, work-out routine for cardio and strength-training, soul-nourishing activities (for me, it is journaling, music, spending time with loved ones and learning something new every day!) and of course, my Korean genes.

Stay young by feeling young. Imagine yourself 20 years from now and you had a gift of going back in time to 2026. How would you live? ENJOY life and love!!

Quiet, Deep Thoughts with No Phones

With all the technology available and all the apps on our phones which pull us into them, it is more important to be aware of this and put it all aside once in a while, at least once a day or more, if possible. 

Try this one night and next day.

An hour or two before bed, turn on sleep and do not disturb modes on your cell phone or if you can, turn it off entirely. Leave the phone in the living room in a drawer or in a closet. Out of sight.

Before bed, try to journal, read a book or think about what happened during the day that you were grateful for. Think about all the people that bring a smile into your life, from the friendly bus driver, the grocery cashier, friends, loved ones. Think of them and send them love out through your window. You will fall asleep smiling.

Try to find a time to fall asleep so you can wake up the next day without an alarm. Open your eyes and savour the process of waking up. Say good morning to yourself and feel the blessing of being able to wake up for a new day! Not to seem grim here, but one day, that blessing will no longer be true - so embrace life! Tell yourself "I love me!"

Morning hygiene routine, take your time, put on the music that sets a positive vibe and wear something that makes you feel beautiful - not for anyone else, just for yourself. Enjoy breakfast in the music, the beautiful clothing and perhaps journal while you eat and enjoy sunrise.

If you have a solitary day, continue with this set tone and you will find yourself have quiet, deep thoughts without being interrupted by a ring tone. Solo time is important for creative ideas and thoughts about decisions in life.

Turn your phone back on, if you need to contact someone about meetings or plans, but try to make that quiet morning last at least an hour into after you wake up.

You will feel more at peace.

And we need more of that in our lives.

Tell me how it works, if you want to share.

Falling in love with waking up

Eyes open. Flutter. 

The faint light of sunrise or the dimness of predawn streams through the small rounds of my eyes. I feel my muscles move with a slowness, newly energized from rest. Tips of toes, fingers. My inner core. I can feel them and I am so happy. I smile. I say "I love you" to the day, to my own spirit.

I love falling in love with waking up.

I get to think. I get to emerge from slumber and feel the heels of my feet on the floor. I get to stretch and move towards the window to see.

Early dawn. How our planet Earth has spun around again so that the horizon greets the rays of our star. 

I get to see and feel these beautiful moments.

I love falling in love with waking up.

I remember when just walking and functioning in the morning was a struggle after my surgeries. I am so happy that today, I get to walk and run!, enjoy the views, and nourish my body, mind and soul all day.

Grateful.

I captured the rare moment when all the conditions are right for the sun to peek through the secret window. Miracles do happen.

What to Expect During the First Three Months of Baby

1. Sleep swaddled
2. Nurse one side
3. Sometimes poo, change diaper
4. Nurse other side
5. Sleep swaddled
6. Goto 1.

Other activities:
Step 3) may happen at anytime.
Random moments of wakefulness during the 24 hour cycle.
Random moments of crying anytime.
Lot of hugging and holding.
Lots of looking at baby in amazement...a miracle she is.

For the Mom:
1. Adjusting to breastfeeding takes a month or more.
2. Critical is a cellphone with texting ability to reach out to friends, baby caretakers, husband when you are immobile while you nurse.
3. Your hair will start falling out after 3 months, some more than others. This may be a good time to enjoy a fresh, new haircut.
4. You will no longer need mat clothes at 3 months, but won't be able to fit into your previous skinny jeans. You may need to purchase some "interim" pants and button down shirts, if nursing.
5. Purchase a breastpump - critical for emergencies.
6. A nursing pillow that has a velcro belt works best, not the U shapes ones. They tend to slip out.
7. Take time everyday to shower, take care of your hair and makeup so you feel good about yourself. A disheveled mom is not a happy mom.

Enjoy this early baby time - it goes by quickly!

Swaddling Baby

Infants are used to the cozy, naturally swaddled place she called home for 9 months. Then after birth, she cries "What is all this space?! I have these long dangling limbs! What are they? Why do they keep hitting my face? Ahh!"

Hence, they are at peace and sleep better when they are all wrapped up.

A recent Globe and Mail article addressed this very question, and here is my take on the whole swaddling.

All three of my babies slept better when swaddled.
They might initially fight the swaddle, but when held right after, they calmed down and stayed asleep longer. Here are the swaddling blankets we used at each step of their infancy.

Newborn: Receiving blankets
1-2 weeks: Swaddle blankets with the velcro
2 months: Woombies as my baby likes to have her arms near her face
4 months: Sleep sacs with the arms sewn up

By 5 months, my second child was out of them.
My first child had a sleep sac with some fabric sewn on the arms as she liked to feel blankets on her mouth.
My third one seems to like blankets on her mouth too, so I imagine the next step in her sleep development will be a sleep sac with open arms, but with longer fabric so she can easily access her "blankie."


Just make sure they do not overheat or are not too cold.
Enjoy the sleeps!

Sleep Issues for Babies and Children

Listed by age, here are the top reasons your babies will interrupt your night sleep.

1. The "fourth trimester" or the first 3 months of baby's life, feedings are every 2-3 hours, poo diapers at all hours of the night, and infants have day-night confusion until 6 weeks when sleep hormones kick in.

2. By the end of the third month, they have a reasonable schedule (wake up 2-3 times to feed at night) but then at 4-7 months, the teeth come in! Another round of sleepless nights.

3. So excited to crawl (6 months) and walk (12 months), they even want to practice during their sleep.

4. At 2-3 yrs, they are potty training, including the nights.

5. At 4-7 yrs, they have bad dreams.

6. By the time they are 8, you may get a full night's sleep for more than a few days.

These do not include issues when they are sick, ear infections, nosebleeds, tummy aches, effects of immunizations. Make sure you have tylenol and advil (for ear infections) in your medicine cabinet.

I am not at the teenage years yet, but I am sure issues will arise then with late nights...

Parenting is a job 24/7...for life. :)

Dividing the Hours in a Day

Some people have asked me "What is your typical day like?"

Well, the days can be different, according to the activities lined up. Some days, the kids need more of my time if they are sick, or I am volunteering at their school. On days which I am on conferences, meetings or speaking engagements, I do not see the children as much.

However, on a typical day, I see my kids for breakfast and off to school, at lunchtime, and after school. I try to walk most of the time, to fit in my exercise. My work fits in during their class hours and after they are in bed by 7:30/8 pm until midnight or so. My husband and I usually work side-by-side in the evening. Hence, it is important to set up an reasonably early sleeping routine in their earlier years (see Healthy Babies, Sleeping Babies.) Once in a while, my husband and I have date night (see Date Your Spouse.) Once a week, we each take one night for our own exercise activities or friends. My music students take lessons on weekend early mornings and some right after school. I also squeeze in my own piano practicing all over the day. At night, I use the damper pedal as my little ones sleep.

Speaking of seeing my kids at lunch, I played a game with my 4 year-old the other day where she put a rice cake in her mouth and I ate the other half. Her incessant giggles brought forth more silliness. I laughed. She laughed. I am happy to be at home with them at this time.

On that note, I'm off to work on this week's piano piece....

Sleeping Babies, Healthy Babies Part II...Nursing

In my last entry about this topic, I outlined a rough nursing/sleeping schedule that worked for me. Some moms prefer the nursing-on-demand; which I did with my first baby, for the first few months. Then it was not working for me. I had no idea when she would start to suckle, when I would be free to even take a shower; it was stressful. Some moms do not feel like that and happily feed on demand - it's amazing how some moms continue that all throughout the babyhood. For me, I was exhausted. I then realized that she was only feeding every hour because she was not getting full from the feeding. If you decide to set up a 2.5/3 hour nursing schedule, make sure she is receiving milk from both sides. Make sure both sides are feel empty after the feeding. Do not encourage "snacking" as then she will want to feed again after an hour. This is key.

Having said all this, if your baby is underweight or underdeveloped, please feed whenever she wants some. However, for most healthy babies, implementing a meal schedule for them should be fine. If your baby is sick or needs an extra feeding, there is no need to be so strict on the schedule. Flexibility, common sense, and your knowledge of your baby should be applied as well.

A recent discussion with a friend of mine revealed that her baby was crying so much because she was not receiving enough of the hindmilk as the mother was producing too much foremilk, giving the baby gas and not filling her up. I had never thought of that! So, the mom had to pump 4 ounces of foremilk every time and then nurse the baby. She and her GI tract then became much happier.

Sleep, play, and eating are all linked together.
The less sleep the child has.
The more tired she will be.
The less likely she will eat.
The less likely she will be engaging in play.
This continues throughout her whole life.

The hungrier your child is.
The more she will cry.
The less she will sleep.

It's all so linked together.

Longer Newborn Sleep

Swaddle.
White noise with a fan or humidifier.
Swaddle.

My first daughter completely opened her eyes when she was not swaddled or even if one finger became unswaddled. Baby stores have velcro swaddlers now. Purchase at least two. Baby will tell you when it's no longer working. If an arm falls out of the swaddle and she is still sleeping, she is ready to graduate from the swaddling.

How do I help my baby sleep?

This seems to be getting lots of attention, so here are my views. Let me start by saying, each baby is different and the first year is the most difficult. For our first daughter, we were novice parents. So, we just held her. We rocked her. I nursed her. Whatever it took to get her to close her eyes and sleep, we did. I mean, come on, all the story books and lullabies you see the Mom or Dad rocking the baby to sleep. Isn't that why the rocking chair was invented? This worked...for a while.

Then at around 6 weeks, she started to wake up during the day and could not fall back asleep unless she was carried, in a carseat, or a swing. What had happened to our sleepy baby? Whenever I tried putting her down during the day after she had fallen asleep, she would wake up in 5-10 minutes, crying yet again. What was going on?

With our trip to the pediatrician, she recommended Weissbluth's book and then I realized what we were doing wrong. We were not teaching our baby how to fall asleep on her own. What a concept. I never thought that would be such a challenge, to fall asleep! So, little by little, we let her cry before naptime or g'night time. Sometimes, she cried a lot. Sometimes, it was heartbreaking. But after we started the new 7-7 schedule and appropriate nap time (see Sleeping Babies, Healthy Babies), she was more content. less tired, and better at falling asleep on her own.

With our second child, we started the schedule and learning to sleep on her own from day one. I would sing her "Somewhere over the rainbow," dance with her a bit and put her in her pack-n-play bassinet. She would be drowsy, but awake and she would look at her Piggy and close her eyes. It was lovely. However, she did go through a month (at about 3 months) where she cried for about 45 minutes before she settled down and fell sleep for the night. It was during those nights, I would close her door and go out for an hour to buy groceries while Papa stayed and watched sports in the other room. However, after the 3-4 weeks, she fell asleep with no problem.

She is our child that can sleep anywhere, anytime. I once had to pick up M from school and it was snowing. I had H on the sled, and I looked back to see she had fallen asleep...sledding. All the way to school and all the way back. She has fallen asleep on the floor in the living room. She can sleep through when I take her to pee-pee at night before I turn in. She is my sleeping champ.

That's our baby sleep story. Hope this helps somebody. I have consulted many Moms about this topic - it has individual hiccups along the way, but it almost inevitably ends up Mom or Dad adopting these sleep strategies.

Why the pack-n-play and not a crib? That can be for another entry.
G'night!

Sleeping Babies, Healthy Babies

I have had many discussion with many moms who had crying babies at the age of 6 weeks. This is what worked for both of my children, mostly based on Dr. Weissbluth's book, "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child."

6:30/7 pm: Bedtime
10 pm: Nurse
1 am: Nurse
4 am: Nurse
6:30/7 am: Awake and nurse
When baby shows drowsy signs, it is naptime - never more than 2 hours of wakefulness.
10 am: Nurse, play (could be less than a few minutes for a newborn,) nap
1 pm: Nurse. play, nap
4 pm: Nurse, play, nap
6:30/7 Nurse

This schedule worked for us, and I made sure Baby got a full feeding (until both sides emptied.) And of course, if Baby is underweight or hungrier with growth spurts, you should feed more often. Please see my entry on nursing in Sleeping Babies, Healthy Babies Part II. Also, if baby is sleeping through, do not wake her up. Let sleeping babies sleep.

As baby grows older, the third nap disappears, then the first one, followed by the second one. As baby starts solid food at 6 months, there is nursing, play, eating and then nap. The nursing disappears after 1-2 yrs. (I did 18 months and 1 yr.) Granted, you have to take these hours with a grain of salt since babies are not clocks, but it is within a 30-45 minutes window. I let my second baby cry a bit before naps and she quickly learned to fall asleep on her own. I gave her a small piggy washable stuffed toy every night earlier on in her pack-n-play, and that was her security for a while.

This schedule allows the child to maintain this sleep pattern throughout their toddler years as the nursings are dropped and solid food is served at regular meal times of 7:30/8 am, 11/12 noon and 5/5:30 pm. With an earlier dinner, children can sleep by 7/7:30 for a full 12 hour night. Early years of JK, SK, primary grades are transitional and emotional. A full night's sleep and healthy eating on times are crucial.

I highly recommend this book! It saved our sleep and thus, every every other part of our lives. If any of you have babies or are pregnant, please read if you haven't already!